Truckers, Seamen and Boy Scouts to be the Tired Eyes of Homeland Security

WASHINGTON -- Teamsters President James Hoffa said Friday he would ask the 500,000 truck operators to be the bleary eyes of homeland security on the roads. Talking to reporters on the White House driveway, Hoffa said he had pitched the idea to President Bush's director of homeland security, Tom Ridge.

"Let this be our new national security slogan," bellowed Hoffa "You Got Your Ears On!" Hoffa said: "I offered the fact that we have 500,000 truck drivers on the road at any one time, and these people can be the eyes and ears of the homeland security office." About 3 million truckers are already being trained to look for suspicious activities such as a truck parked near a tunnel entrance, bridge or highway overpass.

"Our goal is to see that a truck is never used as a weapon," one trucker said "except if the driver falls asleep at the wheel." A national 1-800 number for truckers to call in tips is being established, he said. Plus they've all got CB radios. "Breaker 1-9, we've got us twist-top with a lethal load" might serve as trucker jargon for "I see a suspicous/mentally unstable character hauling a load of deadly cargo." In the event of a large fuel load passing by a Jewish school or temple the message might go out "We've got some Texas Tea going by Galilee."

Michael Sacco, president of the Seafarers International Union, made a similar offer for watching America's seas and ports. And Brian Wilderson, troop leader of Boy Scout troop 36 in Halfmoon, NY offered the use of "dozens of highly trained" Boy Scouts to be the eyes and ears of national security along our country's treacherous bicycle paths. "These boys are trained to keep themselves physically strong, mentally awake, and morally straight. It's in their oath. Once we tell them what to look for I can guarantee you won't see a terrorist riding a bike very far in this town."